7 Steps to Self-Love and More Fulfilling Life

Jul 28, 2018

Self-love is one of the first steps to living a truly fulfilled life that feels good on the inside and shines through to the outside world too. When you feel alighned and have fulfilled life everything around you starts to feel easy and you start to attract the things you desire in life. 

For women in business this is particularly important as we have multidimensional life, constantly filled with ‘to-do’ lists, daily demands of our clients, team members and family. So finding some quiet time for yourself to practice self care, meditation and mindfulness may be just what you need to feel truly aligned. 

Self-love will help you achieve your goals 

When you started your own business, you probably had no idea the self discovery and personal development journey you would embark on. But as you start to grow in your business, you also discover new things about yourself. As women in business, we tend to be self-critical and self judgmental, so it is so important that you are kind to yourself and learn to love the parts of yourself that perhaps others criticised you on before. Recognise that other’s opinions is not reflection of who you are. If you want to achieve more goals in business through self love read our post on ‘The Three Reasons Why Self Will Help You Achieve Your Goals“.

What is self-love, then?

Self-love is a state of appreciation for oneself that grows from actions that support our physical, psychological and spiritual growth. Self-love is dynamic; it grows by actions that mature us. When we act in ways that expand self-love in us, we begin to accept much better our weaknesses as well as our strengths, have less need to explain away our short-comings, have compassion for ourselves as human beings struggling to find personal meaning, are more centered in our life purpose and values, and expect living fulfillment through our own efforts. It also leads to more success in your professional career as talked about in our article “Self Love – Why It Is The First Step to Success“.

Here are Seven-Steps to Self-Love.

Become mindful.

People who have more self-love tend to know what they think, feel and want. They are mindful of who they are and act on this knowledge, rather than on what others want for them. Being aware of your own dreams and desires and following that is your north star. Read “Redefining Success” if you want to learn more on how to prioritise your own personal goals first. 

Act on what you need rather than what you want.

You love yourself when you can turn away from something that feels good and exciting to what you need to stay strong, centered, and moving forward in your life, instead. By staying focused on what you need, you turn away from automatic behaviour patterns that get you into trouble, keep you stuck in the past, and lessen self-love.

Ronnie Eisenberg has written a fantastic “For The Love of Money” article for Women in Business on the power of acting on need rather than want.

Practice good self-care.

You will love yourself more, when you take better care of your basic needs. People high in self-love nourish themselves daily through healthy activities, like sound nutrition, exercise, proper sleep, intimacy and healthy social interactions. Here is useful blog post on “8 Steps to Practicing Self Care” 

Set boundaries.

You’ll love yourself more when you set limits or say no to work, love, or activities that deplete or harm you physically, emotionally and spiritually, or express poorly who you are.

Want to learn more, check out this great post on setting healthier boundaries.

Protect yourself.

Bring the right people into your life. I love the term frenemies. It describes so well the type of “friends” who take pleasure in your pain and loss rather than in your happiness and success. My suggestion to you here: Get rid of them! There isn’t enough time in your life to waste on people who want to take away the shine on your face that says, “I genuinely love myself and life”. You will love and respect yourself more.

Forgive yourself.

We humans can be so hard on ourselves. The downside of taking responsibility for our actions is punishing ourselves too much for mistakes in learning and growing. You have to accept your humanness (the fact that you are not perfect), before you can truly love yourself. Practice being less hard on yourself when you make a mistake. Remember, there are no failures, if you have learned and grown from your mistakes; there are only lessons learned.

If you’d like to dig a little deeper, this fantastic article explores how to stop being your own biggest obstacle to business success.

Live intentionally.

You will accept and love yourself more, whatever is happening in your life, when you live with purpose and design. Your purpose doesn’t have to be crystal clear to you. If your intention is to live a meaningful and healthy life, you will make decisions that support this intention, and feel good about yourself when you succeed in this purpose. You will love yourself more if you see yourself accomplishing what you set out to do. You need to establish your living intentions, to do this.

What change will I see?

If you choose just one or two of these self-love actions to work on, you will begin to accept and love yourself more. Just imagine how much you’ll appreciate you when you exercise these seven-steps to self-love. It is true that you can only love a person as much as you love yourself. If you exercise all of the actions of self-love that I describe here, you will allow and encourage others to express themselves in the same way. The more self-love you have for yourself, the better prepared you are for healthy relating. Even more, you will start to attract people and circumstances to you that support your well-being.

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Janette
Janette
2 years ago

Love this!

Jessica
2 years ago

I really love this, thanks for sharing.

Kerry Pemberton
Kerry Pemberton
1 year ago

Love this! I am in much need of this at present and starting to apply a little self love and its amazing how it can shift your mindset to a more positive state. Thankyou! ???

MaryV
1 year ago

An inspiring roundup of thoughtful practices!

Michele
1 year ago

Lovely and well said! I talk about this and work on this all the time!

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